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CosmoParty2
with a vengence

December 2004



I had to muster up some strength
Throwing another CosmoPartyŠ really forced me to stretch down to the underbelly of the debauchery that still lives in my stinky pinky.  But the circumstances called for it, and my friends were really excited, so I fixed up www.TheCrazyParty.com, and I gave birth to a beautiful baby CosmoParty2 (with Jodi, Beau, and Shayna). My thinker was shocked when I actually felt peaceful and hosted a smelly wormpit too.  

Some of my homies didn't show
An RSVP is this really holy, official pseudo-contract. "Yes go ahead and prepare a place for me because I promise to come." Darby, Jessica, Angelina, what happened? At least Brooke called.  Jessy and Cathy couldn't stay long and Shawn decided to get mad and run away.



High Spirits
A really zany crowd showed up though, and the vibes were as silly as a swami could hope for. The mood just climbed the spiritometer until it peaked out at super crazy around 3:00 am.

 

Drunk-a-clause
We even had a little visit from drunk-a-clause. This man of mystery sometimes shows up on my front porch with an empty measuring cup, "Could I borrow a cup of beer?" He says. Drunk-a-clause can also be seen surfing in full clown suits and protesting cruise ship pollution with a duckie hat.

Open bar all night
The whole point of having a $10 cover was to serve tons of drinx all night: cosmos, mojitos, crazy parties (peach, lemonade, oj, and vodka), rum and coke, chai white russian, jaegar, cocoa beach sluts (crazy party served as a shot), and on and on... Beau (left) trained all the bartenders.

Male/Female Boxing

Nontraditional events
We liked our traditional dancing and boxing events, but we wanted to somehow do the boxing without the violence. We figured out that if you have boys box girls, nobody actually hurts eachother. I think it's really important to have events that people really want to participate in at a party. [Kyle and Jodi (left)]

 

Lightening bolt hair
Jodi shaved lightening bolts into my head, and I sware it made me faster cause I clobbered Kelly with crazy moves by jumping off the furniture. (More Jay vs. Kelly)

Fiance Boxing
Since you really don't want to hit your fiance too hard, Jim invented the masterful light-roll-punch maneuver. He would wind up from across the room and charge Kristina while spinning his gloves hand over hand at head level like he was doing a Mexican hat dance. When he plowed into Kristina he hit her in the head real soft but like 20 times. In the end she pinned him for a 3 count.

Dancing Pole

Building the pole
Again we wanted to have a dance contest, prefarable crack dancing, but Jodi thought it would salt us snails up if we threw a stripper pole into the mix. Me, Beau, and Jodi glued together a steel pipe, flange, and some wood and bolts from Home Depot, and five hours later this (right) is what you get. Here are some instructions on how to build your Own stripper pole. Everyone was so whipped into a teenage puberty frenzy that we never got around the crack dancing.
Fun and Sexy
Kelly came dressed in ballerina slippers and a shirt with spades, clubs, hearts, and diamonds cut out in it.  She was easily the craziest dressed of the night, and the silly Kelly that I know resides somewhere in there came right out.  Meg was all business on the pole, with moves that almost seemed professional.
Break it up
No one wanted to get rocked in Meg's wake, so I had to go to bat and get a little batty, and show them that guys can be sexy too, sort of by counterexample. Most of the other guys had watched too much football to give the pole a spin.


Upsidedown hump the pole
This is a trick that pretty much everyone who grows up in Cocoa Beach has to learn at one time or another. It's a highly complex technique that involves turning upsidedown and moving your pelvis up and down on the pole. I know what you're thinking: "Isn't this guy afraid that a potential employer will read this and then not hire him?" The answer? Not at all my friends. If someone doesn't want to hire me because I know how to do the upsidedown pole hump, then I probably don't want to work for them. Down with the man!

Who won?
The three judges awarded the prize to Ashly, although Meg was probably the best while Kristina was the most graceful. It was a good ole' boy decision.


Don't stop til you get enough
After the dance contest people basically couldn't get enough of the pole or the party. We thought about shutting down the house around 3, but the crowd rebelled, and everyone danced and be'd merry till sunrise'ish.


Past 2 AM
 Tara flies from CA
Right around then Tara flew in and started tending bar and making boys smitten (you know who you are).
Cheryl's boyfriend = angry
Me and Jodi were going to sleep around 3:30, and Cheryl came in to say bye. She was laying on the bed with us for like 20 seconds, and then her boyfriend opened the door and later on yelled at her forever.
Angelic Sharon
I never really noticed until recently, but Sharon looks like an angel when you see her in a crowd of hoodlums.
Spadam is a pole
Spadam says that next time he wants to be the dancing pole. Holly was trying him out.
Everything looks like neon
After a while, even people start to look like neon signs if you bang your head hard enough.

Meg tries to be "that girl"
Last year Julie won the "that girl" award, but this year Meg had a pretty good speech about world peace.
Bobby is vulgar
I mean it. 		Late
Everyone was "hoorah" to keep on going long after I was asleep

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